I've been struggling a lot lately about what it means to be a Christian and even more about whether or not I'm living up to the example of Christ. What does it mean to live out the "Great Commission?" If you notice in Scripture, it's not as obvious as we would like it to be. We do have many examples in Scipture of people who followed, but each person had a different job, a different desire, a different calling. It seems in Scripture that Jesus' disciples went ahead and did great things. They started the church and led many to Christ. Is that everyone's calling? Are we all called to walk the Earth from country to country, state to state, or city to city preaching Christ?
I'm beginning to think otherwise. Sometimes I wonder if I spend too much time trying to figure out what it is I'm supposed to do in life and in the process, missing what's in front of my face. I have a husband and a child. For the most part, I'm a stay-at-home mom. That within itself carries on a large responsibility. I'm responsible for raising my child and teaching him life-lessons, so he can grow to be a responsible adult. On top of that, I'm responsible for being a witness of Christ to Him. God entrusted him to me and my husband. Then there's my husband. I'm responsible for honoring him, respecting him, encouraging him, and being a partner in life.
Actually Genesis 2:18-24 does a great job at summarizing. "Then the LORD God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.' Out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the sky, and brought them to the man to see what he would call them; and whatever the man called a living creature, that was its name. The man gave names to all the cattle, and to the birds of the sky, and to every beast of the field, but for Adam there was not found a helper suitable for him. So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then He took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh at that place. The LORD God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. The man said, 'This is now bone of my bones, And flesh of my flesh; she shall be called woman, because she was taken out of man.' For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh.'" The key word is helper. I am called to be my husband's helper, which requires whatever he asks of me. Right now that is supporting our family financially by working part-time. It also means helping him get a business off the ground, taking care of his household, taking care of his child, and much, much more.
It's funny though, it's almost as if I complain that it isn't enough. It's like I'm telling God that what He has called me to do isn't big enough. How am I impacting the world? I don't know, but I wonder if that's pride, feeling like I need to do great things to impress God or do great things because other people did great things. But, couldn't the way my family is run be a witness to this worldly generation? I really believe the things that God requires of a family is not the social norm. It's normal to cheat on your spouse; it's normal to divorce your spouse when things aren't going right; it's normal to get married for the wrong reasons; it's normal for women to work when they have kids, just to get a good career boost. (By the way, I have no problems with women who work, if that is their calling, but I'm saying that many women also work for selfish reasons. I've heard cases where women work just to get away from their kids or they simply just don't want to do the work of raising their kids. I just wanted to clarify.)
But here, I've come to another stumbling block. Okay, so it's right in front of my face, my first priority is my family, that being my husband and child. Here's the question? What does God want from me in this relationship? He wants me to speak to my husband with respect and not yell at him when things aren't going my way. He wants me to be attentive to my child's needs. But there is a whole world full of temptation which draws me away from my calling, and a lot of it is so subtle.
We spent time talking about sin the other night at my bible study. I came to a conclusion when reading a chapter in Velvet Elvis. Rob Bell talks about how when we sin, we tend to beat ourselves up over it and just let the guilt weigh us down. We forget that we are a new creation in Christ. I wondered if when we are constantly focusing on the things we do wrong and determined we are going to get it right all of the time, isn't that selfishness? Woe is me, I did it wrong, I can't go on, I'm determined to get it right even if it kills me. I'm a terrible person. We end up feeling sorry for ourselves. It then becomes about "me." I don't think God intended it to be that way when we are in Christ. God intended for us to recognize our human condition to show us why we need grace. With that being said, we recognize our sin, we repent and ask for forgiveness, we make ammends with those involved in our sin, we learn from our mistake, and we move on. I believe that satan keeps us focused on our sins to keep us from seeing Christ. And when we aren't seeing Christ, we aren't living out our calling in life. Sometimes our sins draw us so far from Christ, that we stop communicating with Him, and then our calling isn't revealed to us or maybe we know our calling, but without communication, we aren't allowing Christ to do the work in us that is meant to be done.
I know many times I fall short when it comes to my husband or my son. I can also remember a time just recently when I broke down because I just can't seem to get it right sometimes. I know right away when I disrespect my husband or when I'm ignoring my kid. The worst part of it is, sometimes I'm too stubborn to give in. But I also know where I'm lacking, and that's focus. If my feet were planted firmly in Christ, if I was truly surrendering, then Christ can change that evil in me. If my focus was on Christ, I wouldn't be so insecure about my decisions because I would clearly know what He is asking me to do.
This goes back to my post on unity. Why isn't my focus on Christ then? Well, I'm too busy arguing the Bible with people. I'm too busy researching so I can know everything there is to know about the Bible (which I know will never happen). I'm too busy building the next defense to someone who doesn't like what I'm doing. I'm too busy trying to please everyone else. I'm too busy getting caught up in my sins and letting them hold me in bondage, rather than experiencing the freedom of God's awesome mercy and grace. I'm too busy doing the things I want to do, rather than doing things to glorify God, I'm glorifying myself. In this society, that's so easy to do. Our society is about pleasing self or gaining acceptance from others. Jesus was rejected by the people of His society. I think I'm just now being opened up to the fact that these are all the subtle temptations by the enemy to keep me from seeing who I am in Christ and living out my purpose in life. Not only that, but I have a hard time believing that I really do have the strength to do it. I have a hard time believing that I can be a good wife and mother.
Here's another thing. Maybe we need to take care of the little things first (or at least what seems like the little things to us. I'm sure those things aren't so little to God). Maybe I need to tend to my family first before God can trust me with something bigger. I know there is a Scripture somewhere that talks about that, but not sure exactly where it is. There is also a thing called burn-out and one person can't save the world. Besides God already sent Christ to do the saving. We, as Christians, are many working toward the same goal, and that's eternal life. So, we all have many jobs to do. We are the body and we must all have our separate functions, yet still work as a team to accomplish God's plans. Some are called as missionaries, some as evangelists, some as husbands and wives, some as mothers and fathers, and the list goes on. Maybe, just maybe my family can show the love of Christ to someone just in who we are and how we function and love each other. In a world of divorce, same-sex marriages, and adultery, that has to speak volumes. And how many women can honestly say they respect their husband, just like the example of Esther in the Bible? I don't see her lashing out at her husband, calling him names, flipping out because her people need to be saved. Trust me, I'm grouping myself in that category. Unfortunately I speak before I think.
And when it truly comes down to it, what might be in front of our face isn't as easy as we think it's going to be, which is why God wants us to perfect that first, and as we mature, we may move on to other things. It's not easy for me to be a strong-willed woman and submit to my husband. It's not easy to admit when I'm wrong. It's not easy to give myself up, not only for my husband, but for my child too. But I know there is only one way to do it. And that's to fully surrender my will to God, to focus on Him, and remain in open communication with Him. He can't do the work in me unless I let him. That's a free will decision. That focus requires determination. It requires a daily dying to self.
15 comments:
Sarah,
I'm not done yet with the last entry but I have a few thoughts on this one.
You have an awesome responsibility to your family. Today more than any time in the past the family the way God intended it to be is under great attack. You and Keith are called to -
"Train up a child in the way he should go; and when he is old, he will not depart from it." (Pr22:6)
In all things we do we are called to Glorify God. At home, At our place of worship - that should be God centered not man centered - every place we go people should see that we are different than the world. As God brings people into our lives we should be ready to share the Gospel of Jesus Christ with them. If we don't it is like we are meeting a blind person standing on the edge of a cliff about to step off and not say anything to them. We are not only to be concerned about the social issues of the world. We are also to be actively sharing with the lost why they need Jesus that is first and then the fruit of that conversion is taking care of the poor, needy and sick. Why do we need Jesus Sarah? What are we saved from? Jesus came to save sinners. Save them from what to what?
I love you in Christ, more later.
I have no reason to disagree with anything being said. I'm not trying to say that responsibility to my family means I don't have to do anything else. I'm just saying sometimes we go too far to look for our calling, and miss what's in front of our face. I'm not so sure I'm supposed to just drive down to the city and start handing out money or feeding people, however, I don't think I would turn from someone coming to me in need. Our church started a new project called Faith Works Project. It's www.faithworksproject.org It's something our community is doing and possibly hoping to join forces with other churches within the community. Anyways, this is one way we are reacing out to those in need and helping people get on their feet. It's brand new, so I don't think every last detail has been worked out, but it's off the ground and we're giving it a try. We have a guy in our church who lets homeless people stay with him. Of course all of those things are important and of course it's important that we lead people to Christ. Sometimes words are necessary, and sometimes they aren't. I guess it's all just a matter of tapping into the Spirit and seeing where God is leading. The other thing is too, I can't share with the lost until my foundation is at least somewhat solid. And maybe my calling isn't to go out there and walk the streets and start evangelizing. I think what I was trying to say in my post is that I have a family to be with and start practicing my faith with. Once God sees what I can do with my family, then He will trust me with more and start throwing more things my way. But if I can't do right by family, then how can I do right by someone who doesn't know Christ? I found myself lately almost having to rebuild my foundation, which I have to believe is okay. I spent many years growing up under my parents and their teaching and the teachings of the churches they went to. Now it's time for me to go out there and discover a faith I can call my own. After all, this is my journey and nobody can walk it for me. I do, however, hope that my friends will be there to encourage me through my journey and hold me accoutable to the things that are "black and white" in the Scriptures and love me through the hard times and the struggles. Okay, wow, didn't expect to write all of that. My brain just never stops thinking, and to tell you honestly, when it comes to my walk with Christ lately, I haven't been able to stop thinking. I believe I'm onto something though. Again, thanks for your comments and I agree with much of what you say. I just wish I knew who I was talking to, obviously someone who knows me.
It's okay; I would like to know what you don't agree with. We can have a "conversation". I think that it is great that you are finding your own walk with the Lord and Savior. I have seen many that didn't have their own, and when they left the home they went into the world and became part of it.
God will give you only what you can handle. Jesus sent the Twelve out- Matt. 10:5-15. Here is a summary from our sermon today.
1. Jesus will equip you for where ever he sends you.
2. Know your ministry target.
3. Clearly understand the message.
a. Repentance
b. Faith - Believe in Jesus
c. Submit to the Lordship of Christ
4. Expect God's power to confirm the message.
5. Always make ministry about giving not getting.
6. Trust God to provide your needs.
7. Make your ministry stable.
8. Minister to the receptive.
9. Know how to handle the non-receptive.
This is what being missional is all about as taught by our teacher, Jesus. Don't compare yourself to anyone or any project, be open for the Lord to use you and Keith, and he will do the work, and give you the words. It is in his power that we are able to do anything.
As for sharing the gospel, what if your doctor waited to tell you that you have a terminal disease. What if he waited until he had his entire house in order or even worse he felt you didn’t have a good enough relationship to tell you the truth? You might die before that happens. Or what if he told you, you need to take this medicine, but didn't tell you why, you wouldn't take it.
Why do we need Jesus Sarah? What are we saved from? Jesus came to save sinners. Save them from what to what?
I love you in Christ, more later.
I'm not so sure that I'm at all disagreeing with what you are saying, am I? I mean, I guess what I'm trying to say is we don't always have to preach with words. Actually, in today's world, I find it hard to just "tell" people about Christ. How many people out there say they are Christian, but don't live their life that way? I think my actions should speak louder than words. In fact Francis of Assisi once said, "Preach the gospel at all times - if necessary, use words." Again, though, I'm not sure that's disagreeing with anything you said, I don't think. I wrote about my role in the family because if I can't act like a "believer" in my own household, then how can I do this outside of my house to the rest of the world. In other words, God has put a job in front of my face. I need to show I can accept this responsibility before I can take on other things as well. It's like raising a kid. You don't just let them do what they want. You start out easy, if they can handle the small things, then you slowly start trusting them with bigger things. Jesus' disciples didn't just go out and preach the gospel, they spent time with Christ first and practiced with Jesus. Then, the went out there. Paul spent a few years learning before he fulfilled his ministry. I mean, if someone were to ask me about Christ, or I sensed an urgency from the Spirit to preach the Word, certainly I wouldn't hold back. Keith and I are trying to figure out exactly what are gifts are and how God wants us to use them, but God hasn't revealed anything major thus far, so we keep praying and in the meantime, we make the best of what's in front of our faces. My home, right now, is a ministry. I have to train my child so he can hopefully come to know Christ, and he can be prepared to go out into the world and preach the gospel. But I think that's along the same lines of what you said. You ask what Jesus came for, and you're right, he came to save sinners. Once we accept Christ we are a new creation. I'm still really thinking about what that means being we just discussed this the other night in our bible study. I mean, I know what it means, but I feel like it goes deeper than what I always thought it to mean. Do you know what I mean? Haha! Sorry, had to be funny for a minute. Anyways, we need God's grace because we aren't perfect and we fail, so we need to accept our condition and realize that we need something bigger to complete us, because without Christ, our life is meaningless. Christ makes our lives meaningful. Okay, that's all I have for now. Again, my thoughts may sound jumbled because I've been given a lot to think about lately. That's what's so great about our group. I've also been diving into the book of John and it's quite thought-provoking.
Those of you out there reading this, please feel free to contribute to the mix. But I wanted to say one thing to ballofdirt. I wanted to publish your last comment, and I have to admit I rejected it before I really had a chance to think about it. I understand you are looking for conversation. Unfortunately I can't force everyone to comment, but I'm trying my best to understand where it is you are coming from and it seemed like you were getting mad. Okay, let's get back to the mission thing. I will take you back to our sermon the day we talked about Faith Works Project. By the way, I think we do agree. Obviously we have the Great Commission found in Matthew 28:18-20. Then it's taken a step further after Christ's resurrection when He sends out his disciples to the "ends of the earth" in Acts 1:7-9. Another example of our "mission," feeding the poor, clothing people, etc, we see in Matthew 25:31-40. This is how the Good News affects how we react with the world. Scripture makes it clear what we are called to do. This means our interest should be to the people on the outside, poor, sick, hungry, thirsty, criminals. In Galatians 2:9-10, Paul mentions again the importance of remembering the poor. But he not only talks about meeting physical needs, but also meeting spiritual needs. The sermon went on further to talk about James 1:27 where again it mentions taking care of widows and the poor, but we are also commanded not to be polluted from the ways of the world. We are to go out into the world, however keeping our faith in tact. Then our pastor went on to talk about Grace. We are saved by grace, and this isn't something we do, it has already been done. And he said that a real true faith is matched by real true action. James talks about this. "Faith without works is dead." The two go hand-in-hand. He gave us some background of the Great Commission and related to today. He compared Jerusalem to our daily lives. This is our call. And Judea and Samaria is church planting. But what about the ends of the earth? Well, here's what I took from that. I'm a missionary just by carrying the gospel wherever I go, which in my mind, doesn't have to be overseas. It could mean that, but it doesn't have to mean that. I mean look at our country. We have a HUGE immigration problem. There is a place to fight for our freedoms and rights as Americans, however we still need to look at this from the perspective of love. We have people from many countries that come here for freedom. We, as Christians, should still welcome them and spread the gospel to them. Some of us may not get to them, but they are coming to us.
Now, my post talks about my family. Yes, I believe there is a heavy calling there as well. But it all works together. I have to show that I can raise one child and keep this household on a firm foundation. That doesn't mean I stop missioning to the rest of the world, but I was trying to say everyone has a different calling, yet Scriptures are clear what we are to do by giving us a broad picture. But that broad pictures can mean many things to many people. This is why I like Faith Works Project. It's a start in the right direction. Again, my apologies for not posting your last comment. I guess I got frustrated because I'm trying to understand what you want from conversation. Anyways, does this help?
Sarah,
Where in the last entry -that was not moderated- did I sound angry?
I shared my thoughts on what it is to be missional.
Why do you get defensive?
Actually, it wasn't that entry, it was the one that didn't get published. I guess you were asking where everyone was and needing a conversation. I just didn't want others that read my blog to feel pressured into a conversation, but anyways, I had to think about it. I do get defensive, you are right, simply because this whole "journey" has been uphill for quite a while. Then we finally find a church that we love and a group of people that we like, and we've been catching a little heat. Not that we need anyone's approval, which is a HUGE problem I have, but I guess I just get frustrated. I'm also frustrated because Keith and I would love to get together with you sometime and talk. It's easy to get defensive over a blog because it's all writing and you can't tell someone's tone. The e-mail is what started a few of the fights my mother and I had, simply because we were bad at reading each other's tone. I don't mean to get defensive and I did apologize in my last comment. I'm just still struggling through some things and wrestling a bit with my faith, not that I think it's in danger or anything, but I believe God is challenging me in many ways, which isn't necessarily bad.
I guess I'm just also trying to understand where it is exactly that you are coming from. That's why I think it would be easier if we could all meet up some time and we can really sit down and talk about this "journey" and you can really understand what has been occuring in our lives. If you wish to continue this in my blog, that's fine too, I just find it a little more difficult.
I guess I'm realizing you just simply want a conversation, but I also want my blog to be a "happy place." I know that sounds so silly, but seriously. I want people to express their thoughts, but I don't want to see it get out of control, not that it has, but I'm just making sure. So please don't take it personal that I didn't publish your last comment. I thought you were made because there wasn't enough conversation or the conversation we were having wasn't satisfactory.
Anyways, let's move on now. What's past is past. So, I do see what you are saying about being missional. I hope that I was able to clarify some more in my last comment. So, what else is on your mind?
Luke 19:10 says, "For the Son of Man came to seek and save the lost." Matthew 9:11-13 says, "And when the Pharrisees saw this, they said to his disciples, "Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?" But when he heard it he said, "Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. Go and learn what this means, 'I desire mercy, and not sacrifice' For I came not to call the righteous, but sinners." John 3:17, "For God did not send His Son into the world to condem the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him."
What are we saved from? God's wrath (Eph.5:6, Col. 3:6), the lake of fire (Rev. 20:15).
What are we saved to? Revolation 22:3-5 says, "No longer will there be anything accursed, but the throne of God and of the Lamb will be in it, and his servants will worship him. They will see his face, his name will be written on their foreheads. And night will be no more.They will need no light of lamp or sun, for the Lord God will be their light, and they will reign forever and ever."
What about from now until that day? Ephesian 2:4-10 says, "But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ-by grace you have been saved-and raised us up with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which were prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them." Also read 2 Corinthians 5:1-6:10.
Continue to challenge one another, love one another , and encourage one another.
The narrow way is difficult enough. Remember the fruit of the Spirit. Stay away from dissentions and divisions (Gal.5:20).
Search the Scriptures. Follow Jesus' example.
Okay,
I guess the conversation is just for those who keep it happy. Not the Sarah I used to know.
I care about you and your family more than you know. When this man centered theology falls short again, you will come back to the Cross.
I will sign off and leave your blogg alone.
I like your post, Sarah. I agree: sometimes we are so focused on searching for this mysterious and evasive calling (like it has to be earth-shattering or something) that we neglect the obvious place of ministry in which we are already placed.
I'm not quite sure I know where to start as I have been wrestling with this all day. To ballofdirt, I wish I didn't have to come to this. I don't think you fully see what I'm saying, and again, I'm just not good with written words sometimes. I feel I can communicate my thoughts better in person. After all, this is a blog, which does a lot of summarizing. We've hardly spoken in the last couple of years, which is why I can see why it's hard for you to understand where I am. I try real hard not to follow man-made theology. However, I can't help but enjoy some of the truths and wisdom which God has gifted to man. I know you aren't a Rob Bell fan, and that's okay. Some people aren't. Never once did I say I completely agree with what he says. Never once did I say that my church is perfect and does everything right, but can you honestly say that about your church or about some of the pastors or authors that you like? If you would actually sit in on the group I'm studying Velvet Elvis with, you would see that there have been some battles we came up against. You would see that we do look at Scripture above his book. However, I'm not going to deny the fact that Rob Bell has brought up some interesting points which I am pondering on. These points haven't taken me away from Scripture, but only pressed me further into it. But when it comes down to it, it's not about emergent to me or any other denomination. I didn't find out until after we pretty much decided we liked where were going to church that our church was even "emergent." I then joined the link group reading Velvet Elvis because I was always curious about the book. What I like about my community is the people and the actions which come from knowing Christ. They are young people who can relate to where I am in life. It's been kind of refreshing. So many times I have found young people not wanting to be in community or fellowship together, but my church offers the complete opposite. These are real people who battle Scripture from time-to-time and wrestle through it together so that we can bring each other to truth. But it doesn't have to be just about Scripture. Can you honestly tell me that Pastor Mike is perfectly sound in his teaching? I could sit here and tell you I don't fully agree with his ways of doing things, however that doesn't mean he isn't smart or he isn't a good teacher. You are involved in an imperfect community, just as I am. You love where you are just as I love where I am. God called you to that church, just as God has called me to my church. I firmly believe this is where we are supposed to be right now. God is working in our family in ways I never say coming to us. I tell you, you have nothing to worry about. I see you are frustrated and you think that Rob Bell is going to cause me to stumble and get into something bad, but Rob Bell is not my God. My pastor is not my God. But, these are some interesting people to listen to, as well as others who teach at my church and even outside of my church. This has nothing to do with emergent or not emergent. You're in Assemblies of God. That's just as much man-made as Emergent. Pastor Joe taught at an Assemblies of God church, but that didn't mean that he believed it's doctrine to the entirety. So, how do you know my church isn't just as balanced in its beliefs? I admit, I enjoy a good teaching on Sunday mornings. In fact, I take notes so that I can reflect on it later, and many times I do. No, I don't just take its teachings for its word, I look back on it later. But, I'm also open to teaching. I don't profess to know it all and I realize that there are some things I believe that I could actually be wrong about. We are called to have a teachable spirit. Heck, that's what I love about the leadership at my church. Those that I know are so humbling. They aren't haughty by any means and love to be challenged. And the ones I know in leadership have this gift that is so obvious. There's this one guy who teaches on some Sunday mornings, who might have some college background, but hasn't been through seminary or anything, and I just love listening to him. He matches his life experiences with Scriptures and seems to just hit me right where I am. He can so easily relate to the demographic. Why is it he can do it just so? Because God has given him a gift? It isn't about having a degree or being a part of this affiliation or that affiliation, it's about using the gifts God has given us. Granted, I don't want to downplay the education our pastor has because that is a benefit to the congregation as well. It's great to get the history behind the Scriptures. I know I don't have hours and hours every day to do research on the internet to look for that stuff. Gosh, I could go on forever. Ballofdirt, I really wish we could get togehter and hash this out. I would love to share my story with you, not that I feel I have to prove anything, but you are genuinely concerned for some reason, but I think that some of what you are seeing isn't really there. I love the Lord and I don't think I could get into heaven without Jesus Christ. I wouldn't tell anybody else that either. I think you should look past some of the issues of the emergent church and recognize that just because some are bad, doesn't mean they are all bad. I also wish you would come visit one Sunday and maybe catch a small glimpse of what drew me in. It had not much to do with teaching or how they did contemporary worship, IT WAS THE PEOPLE. The actions spoke louder than words my first day there. It automatically felt like home. It automatically felt like a family. I've made some awesome connections and I can't wait to see how these relationships unravel. I feel like I'm part of a team doing this Jesus thing together. I have people to encourage me and hold me accountable. I have people to wrestle with Scripture with me. You must understand that because I imagine that's why you like your church. "Emergent" is just a title like every other church out there. The question isn't so much the title, but the question is Jesus. Why has Jesus called this community together? What is our purpose? What is our mission? How will Jesus use our gifts in this community? Are we obeying Jesus? I have to tell you, we aren't perfect, but I do believe we are stepping in the right direction. Please, please, get in contact with me. I don't want to fight, I just want to come to an understanding. Perhaps you and I are separate paths, and that's okay. God has a different calling for you than he does for me. Brother, let me ask you this, no matter what our calls are, can we do this together? Can we we encourage each other? Can we pray for each other, perhaps even pray together? Jesus walks side by side with us, so let us walk side by side together.
Overcomer, I would like to thank you for your comment as well and answering the question about what are we saved from. I have to admit I purposely hadn't attacked that question. I guess I was still thinking about how I wanted to formulate the answer, but I completely agree. I have to admit the idea of "grace" and being saved is so far beyond my little brain, that it's hard for me to respond. I do know what Scripture teaches. It teaches that I am a new creation, that the old has passed away and the new has come. In my own life, I'm still figuring that one out. Because it sometimes is so far beyond my thinking, it makes me realize how big God is. It's deep and I probably only see a glimpse of God's grace and mercy. I'm intrigued by the mystery of it all. I'm working all of this out, and it's a life-long process. I also agree that we should stay away from these divisions. I get so tired sometimes of all the fighting and arguing over who's right. Granted, there are some fundamental truths which may need to be debated. I love a good debate any day, but I don't want a good debate to divide us. I love to be challenged and I'm so hungry for Scripture. This is why I'm reading the book of John. It's been a long reading because it's hard to take in and I'm challenged to think. I'm surfacing on something, and I can't quite figure out what it is, but I know the Lord is taking me somewhere. That's what this whole blog, "The Journey" is about. It's simply that, a journey. It can't just stop at realizing we are a new creation. Then it's about, well, what does that mean? What does that mean for me? I wish we could have it all figured out, but I know I'm not supposed to be God. I'm supposed to continue needing Him and as long as there's mystery, I'm going to keep needing Him. I pray for those of you that have been responding as I hope you are praying for me. You are right, this narrow road is tough enough. This is why I need encouragement and hope to offer you guys encouragement. We are the body of Christ. We work together. We need each other.
Shannon, I also wanted to acknowledge your comment. I know all of these comments have all gotten off topic from my original post, which is quite alright, but thank you for seeing what I was saying all along. I know you are a young mother who sees exactly where I am, and by reading your blog, I know we battle some of the same things at home and in life. I only wish you and I had this relationship all along in life. We've been cousins for 26 years and just now we are connecting. I'm so glad for that and I only hope our relationship grows. I love reading your e-mails and you have been such an encouragement. You have also challenged me, but thank you for taking the time to read some of the literature I sent about church and where I am. I know you don't fully agree with some of the concepts, but thank you for accepting those disagreements and seeing them as the minors that people just don't agree with.
Also, thank you Overcomer for your encouragment as well. I know you understand where we are. I haven't forgotten the Scriptures. If anything, I'm really working toward making more time to read. I'm a work in progress.
Also, thank you ballofdirt for caring enough to say anything. I only hope we can come to some understanding as I care for you and your family as well. I wish we could get together more often. I wish to keep my blog open to you too. I welcome your comments, I was just hurt by your last remark, but I can move past that. You're right in that I am not the same person, but I like to think that's because I've matured a little. I'm hoping that God is shaping me to be the person He wants me to be. I have to admit, I can be a bit stubborn, so God has a tough cookie on his hands, but I'm sure He knows that and He knows just what I need.
Thank you Overcomer, that's all I wanted to hear. Does anyone care about what Jesus did on the cross for us or is all about what I can get out of church.
Worship God not man Sarah, please be careful.
2Tim 3:16-17
16 All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness;
17 so that the man of God may be adequate, equipped for every good work.
I will sign off now Sarah you know who I am. Overcomer has said what the focus of our love should be. We must understand this most awesome sacrifice, that was made for a worm like me. I do not deserve anything but the wrath of God that CRUSHED HIS SON in my place. Isaiah 53:10 NAS But the Lord was pleased to CRUSH Him.
What is more humbling (for me) and LOVING (of GOD) than this act, it has brought me to my knees weeping many times in the past 9 months.
Keep this first always, and you will have all the love you need for the social gospel you believe in now. It will be fulfilled by Jesus working through us.
Gosh, if I knew that's all you were looking for, I would've said that a long time ago. Maybe that's my fault. I'm female and tend to overthink things. I was looking past the question to see if you were expecting more. I didn't realize you were testing me. Anyways, again, I do agree with Overcomer. However, the things Overcomer speaks of has largely been on my mind and I guess I just haven't been able to put some of those things into words. As I said before, the thought if Christ and what he did is sometimes so far beyond me, that I just can't fathom it or put it into words. You're asking me to be careful, but I try not just dive into any theology that's being fed to me, however I dig into a bit to see what it's about and I try to match it up with Scripture. Like I said, my church isn't necessarily about its theology, it's about the loving community I found. The community in which we have one thing in common, that being Christ. Well, I hate to see you sign off completely and Keith and I would still like to get together with you sometime and talk. I really would like you to understand our journey fully so that we can pray together and pray for each other. I would also like to hear more about your journey. This isn't just about us, but sharing our lives with each other. We haven't fellowshipped with you guys in a while, so it would be nice. Just say the word.
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